Making Change a Choice: Why Your Horse's Nervous System Holds the Key to Movement

The revolutionary approach that's transforming how we work with animals and ourselves

As a movement specialist who's worked with thousands of horses, dogs, and their humans, I've seen the same frustrating pattern play out countless times: the harder we try to "fix" movement problems, the more resistance we encounter.

The stiff horse who braces against our efforts to improve their flexibility. The aging dog who tenses up when we try to help their mobility. Even our own bodies, which seem to fight us when we attempt to change long-held postural habits.

For years, I thought the solution was better technique, more pressure, or simply more persistence. I was approaching the problem entirely wrong.

The Nervous System's Hidden Agenda

Here's what changed everything: I realized that whether we're talking about your horse's nervous system, your dog's nervous system, or your own, there's one overriding priority that trumps everything else—safety.

The nervous system's primary job isn't to help you move beautifully or efficiently. It's to keep you alive. Every movement pattern, even the ones that seem maladaptive, exists for a protective reason.

When we rush in trying to "correct" these patterns, we're essentially telling that ancient survival system that we know better. And it doesn't trust us—nor should it.

The Three Pillars of Choice-Based Change

Through my work developing the Debono Moves method and years of studying the Feldenkrais approach, I've discovered three fundamental principles that work with the nervous system rather than against it:

1. Start Where It's Already Easy

This might be the most counterintuitive principle, but it's also the most powerful. When working with your horse or dog, begin on the side that moves freely, not the side that's restricted.

I know this goes against every instinct. When you see stiffness or limitation, you want to address it directly. But here's the thing—that restriction exists for a reason. The nervous system is protecting something it perceives as vulnerable.

By starting where movement is easy and comfortable, you're essentially saying to the nervous system, "Look, I'm not here to fight you. I'm here to make things feel better." The nervous system's guard comes down, and suddenly it becomes curious about new possibilities.

2. Keep It Optional

This principle applies whether you're working with a 1,200-pound horse or your own tight shoulders. The moment something feels forced, the nervous system goes into protection mode.

With animals, this means if your horse shifts position or your dog wants to move away, you respect that. You're not trying to impose change—you're having a tactile conversation. You invite, but you don't insist.

With yourself, it means staying within your comfort zone initially. No stretching to the point of pain, no forcing your body into positions that feel scary or unsafe.

3. Less Is More

Some of the most profound changes I've witnessed have happened in sessions lasting just a few minutes—sometimes even less. When you work gently and briefly, you're allowing the nervous system to integrate new information without becoming overwhelmed.

This is radically different from the "no pain, no gain" mentality that pervades so much of fitness and rehabilitation. Instead, we're creating an environment where change feels good, natural, and safe.

The FeldenkraisⓇ Connection

These principles aren't just theoretical—they're grounded in decades of research into how the nervous system learns and adapts. The Feldenkrais MethodⓇ, developed by physicist and martial artist Moshe Feldenkrais, demonstrated that the brain changes most readily when we:

• Stay within our comfort zone initially
• Move slowly and with attention
• Take frequent breaks for integration
• Approach movement with curiosity rather than judgment

What's fascinating is that these same principles apply whether you're working with a human nervous system or an animal one.

Why This Matters Now

In our fix-it culture, we've forgotten something essential: lasting change happens from the inside out, not the outside in. When we try to impose new patterns without getting buy-in from the nervous system, we create internal conflict.

The result? Either the old patterns return with a vengeance, or we create new problems by forcing changes the system isn't ready for.

Putting It Into Practice

Whether you're working with your horse, your dog, or yourself, try this approach:

With Your Animal:

• Begin each session with what feels good and easy
• Keep your touch gentle and supportive
• Watch for signs of relaxation and curiosity
• End before they lose interest
• Respect their boundaries and past experiences

With Yourself:

• Notice areas of ease before addressing areas of tension
• Move slowly enough to feel differences
• Stay curious about what you discover
• Take breaks to let your nervous system integrate
• Avoid forcing or pushing through discomfort

The Moment Everything Changes

There's a moment in this work—and if you do it, you'll recognize it—when resistance melts away and the nervous system essentially says, "Oh, this feels better. I choose this."

That's the moment change becomes sustainable. Not because you've overpowered old patterns, but because you've offered something the nervous system recognizes as genuinely beneficial.

It's the difference between compliance and cooperation, between submission and willing participation.

Your Invitation to Explore

If you've been struggling with stubborn movement patterns—whether in yourself or your animals—I invite you to experiment with this gentler approach. Start small, stay curious, and trust the wisdom of the nervous system.

Remember: you're not trying to fix anything. You're offering new possibilities and letting the nervous system choose.

For more insights on movement, wellness, and working with animals, listen to the Easier Movement, Happier Life podcast. Episode 124 dives deep into these concepts with practical examples you can start using today.

"Change isn't something you impose—it's something you invite." - Mary Debono 

Resources:
💥Learn how the Feldenkrais MethodⓇ can help improve your seat, position, and balance on your horse! Free rider videos: https://www.marydebono.com/rider 💥

Grab your FREE video training to help your dog. 🐕 https://www.marydebono.com/lovedog 💥

Get Mary’s bestselling, award-winning book, “Grow Young with Your Dog,” for a super low price at: https://tinyurl.com/growyoungwithyourdog. Demonstration videos are included at no extra cost. ⬅️⬅️⬅️

Want to sit in a more balanced, secure way? Click here for all the details on our new series.
Effortless, Balanced Sitting: A FeldenkraisⓇ Movement Series  ⬅️⬅️⬅️

All information is for general educational purposes ONLY and doesn't constitute medical or veterinary advice or professional training advice. Please consult a qualified healthcare provider if you, your horse, or your dog are unwell or injured.  Always use extreme caution when interacting with horses and dogs.

About the Host:

Mary Debono is a pioneer in animal and human wellness, blending her expertise as an international clinician, best-selling author, and certified Feldenkrais Method® practitioner. With over three decades of experience, Mary developed Debono Moves, a groundbreaking approach that enhances the performance, well-being, and partnership of animals and their humans.

Mary's innovative approach draws from the Feldenkrais Method®, tailored specifically for horse and dog enthusiasts.  Her methods have helped animals and humans:

• Improve athletic ability and performance
• Enhance confidence and reduce anxiety
• Reduce physical limitations and discomfort
• Deepen the human-animal bond

Mary's flagship online programs, "Move with Your Horse" and "Easier Movement, Happier Dogs," provide animal enthusiasts with an innovative approach that combines the concepts of Feldenkrais® with her signature hands-on work for horses and dogs. Through this transformative method, both people and their animal companions discover greater harmony, ease, and connection.

As a sought-after speaker and educator, Mary has impacted animal enthusiasts worldwide, guiding them to enhance their relationships with their animals through mindful movement and deeper body awareness. Her work empowers individuals to unlock new levels of understanding and communication with their beloved companions.